


-Deadly Viruses- (Discontinued)

by dataPixels



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: And reader swears like a sailor, Gen, Jim is an annoying prick, Panic Attacks, Reader has panic disorder, Reader is a really good hacker holy shit, Reader is in early 20s, Reader works for Jim, Sherlock is confused as to why you're living with Jim, There's some subtle Johnlock in there, You live with him in his flat, actual trash, but you're friends, oh and, panic disorder, reader is a hacker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-28
Updated: 2017-09-20
Packaged: 2018-12-20 23:09:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 17,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11931279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dataPixels/pseuds/dataPixels
Summary: Sherlock Holmes is a consulting detective, Jim Moriarty is a consulting criminal.You? You're a mix of both. A consulting hacker.One day, you were hired to spy on the one and only Moriarty, you were the best after all. Long story short, you now work for him, and shit hits the fan more than you would like to admit. But hey, you two are inseparable. Even if you do betray him, you won't get very far.------------------------------------Discontinued, enjoy my old writing I guess <3 I offer my thanks for those who has read my story, I will move onto even better (and trashier) works soon!





	1. A Strange and Dangerous Request.

Everyone has their hobbies. You always loved technology, opening up old devices and tinkering with them. When tech became more advanced and more accessible, you bet your ass you learned how to mess with it. And not only your own tech, but other's as well. You managed to make a living off of it, doing small jobs for some extra cash.

Small jobs turned into big jobs, helping assassins find their targets, giving people new identities. Needless to say, it was very entertaining, watching people pay so much for easy jobs.

===============

You wake up from your slumber, the sound of your alarm freeing you from the grasps of sleep. After doing your usual morning routine, you open your laptop and start preparing some toast for breakfast. On your desktop, the familiar black box alerting you to a new job. You quickly opened the details and, whoa. 5000 Pounds for spying on someone? The submission was anonymous, but if it's so expensive, then it must be someone important. A government official maybe? And it's someone by the name of.. wait, that can't be right. You read over it multiple times, there's no way you're doing this shit.

Jim motherfucking Moriarty.

Naturally, you panic. What if he catches you on the act? What will he do to you? Your heart started to pump faster and harder, your breathing erratic. A panic attack. You've had multiple before, but it's always hard. You started to shiver, and cried your eyes out. You tried to focus on your breathing, okay, you got that down. You think about happy memories, and that this'll pass.

===============

You clutched the desk in front of you, that was really draining. Maybe you shouldn't do it? Stick to what you're comfortable with, dealing with evil geniuses wasn't your everyday job. You might need to take a nap, but since when did you get naps? You tried to calm yourself down further, you need to think rationally if you want to survive.

When the attack fully passes, you think about the job without bias, weighing the risk and reward. You thought about it, long and hard. Okay, fine, you didn't think about it too much. Your mindset was 'I have nothing else to do, fuck it'. You clicked the accept button, and started to get to work.

Gathering information on Moriarty wasn't the most.. comforting experience. But to do this job properly, it's unfortunately required. Most of the people you spied on before had debts to pay, and they knew it. Being paranoid led to installing security cameras, which made your job much easier. Moriarty however, he was different. He's smart, he wouldn't install cameras, which made your job much harder.

But you're getting ahead of yourself, aren't you? You don't know where the man lives for Christ's sake, how the fuck are we going to do this? Sure, you may or may not have a list of powerful people's addresses, but no one would be willing to sell info on him. Sure there are stories of what he does do to people who try to backstab him, but you would expect SOMEONE to sell him out.

You were going to have to do this the hard way. It would work in theory, but you never tried it out before. The first, and albeit much longer plan, was to hack most of the security cameras in London, register his face, and let the machines do the work. The second, much faster but more unlikely was to set up your own cameras where you think he would either visit often, or visit in the future.

But it was way too early for this shit, you grab some popcorn and begin microwaving it. You're binge watching Supergirl today, and nothing is going to stop you. You can deal with spying on a criminal mastermind before you sleep.


	2. Snared

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh deary me, seems like you've fallen for a trap! How and why? Read this chapter to find out ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y/I=Your Initials

tick, tick, tick, TICK.

You really want to get rid of that clock soon, it's ticking is driving you up the walls. The underlying threat of getting caught was bad enough. You were currently watching through the lens of one of your set-up cameras. If you calculated and thought about this correctly, someone who works for Jim should be walking into the coffee shop any minute now. You managed to dig up a text conversation from Jim to one of his assassins. 

"Kylianne Julies, Coffee shop on Citren St. 3:00Pm, can't miss her.  
-JM"

Many other texts detailing past victims were before that one. You were watching the inside of the coffee shop on top of said building. It was crowded today, so you assume that the attempt to murder 'Kylianne' was to poison her drink. You actually searched up the name, first result was her profile on a dating website, apparently she's a ""Coffee-Maniac!"" according to her bio. Through more digging, she really wasn't what she seemed. Her ex was 'Heartbroken' from the news that she had been cheating on him. And not only that, she had been using his government position to smuggle money and classified info to someone she had been working for.

Angry and clearly looking for revenge, he had reached out to Moriarty. Quite a petty reason really, but he was willing to pay a lot. And the person Kylianne was working for had some old feuds to settle with Moriarty. And HOLY SHIT you were right, here comes whoever Aristides was, it obviously wasn't his real name. Okay, you searched through your cameras, and AHA! There he is! Okay, he's sitting down next to a girl, probably some small talk. Assuming she's Kylianne, she left the table, and.. YESSSSSSSSS! He slipped something into her drink and waited until she got back. 

Everything's going smoothly so far, and going according to your calculations from earlier.

==================

That felt longer than it should have, but hey, Kylianne (probably) is either knocked out or dead due to whatever poison Aristides put in her drink. She did look quite peaceful, but the trace of a shocked reaction was left on her face. Okay, game time. You closed your laptop, put it in your bag, and did a quick re-run of your plan.

Follow assassin for a bit, 'bump' into him, place a tracker somewhere on his body, go home.

Here goes nothing.

==================

Okay, he's heading somewhere. The pin on the laptop's screen shows that he was riding a cabby, but to where? You needed to find that out, but now that he's quite ahead of you, it's time for part 2 of your plan. You were following this bitch and questioning him. You of course hired a sniper to be where you need her to be. You'll shoot her a text as to where once you actually know where you're going.

You hailed a taxi, and just told him to go straight, you'll give him directions in real time. You swiftly gave him orders on where and when to go right or left, following the path your assassin took. And hey, he finally stopped at some abandoned museum. You gave the driver the name of the place and let him do the rest.

You should shoot your sniper a text, so that she can get there in advanced.

"Hey be at Pewter Museum soon, we're getting our hands dirty.  
-Y/I"

===================

You get to your destination in about 7 minutes, you did some research on the place. Unfortunately, nothing useful came out of it. You shot her another text.

"Found the target? Keep your aim on him, don't shoot though.  
-Y/I"

You draw your gun, you've had enough training to have good enough aim. This little shit is about to give you some info. You strode forward as quietly as possible, looking behind your back every now and then. When you finally reached the center and main part of the museum, the scene made your heart drop, the sniper you hired was lying there, dead.

Okay, you were starting to panic now, you hadn't thought of a back-up plan if your sniper got killed, first mistake. Your heart started to pump faster, 'Not now!' you thought.

"Honestly? Just one? I was expecting more from you, how disappointing." You heard from someone. Whoever he was, his voice was laced with toxicity, scared you half to death. You heard footsteps from the left, wait no, it's from the right- it was everywhere! Your mind was scrambling to focus, you couldn't breathe properly, but you have to keep calm. You muttered the mantra to yourself, 'Carry on, carry on, carry on," It helped you maintain your composure, you can see clearly again.

You wish you couldn't. The sight only made you panic even more, what had gone wrong? Your plan should have gone accordingly, but what should have and shouldn't anymore? Everything seems to be falling apart. The sight made you want to vomit.

"holy fucking shit, shit,shit, shit" You muttered, but came out more like a yelp. It was Jim Moriarty, your nightmare and the person you wished you would never meet. You said that aloud, or did you? What was real and what wasn't anymore?

"Don't worry, we'll talk about this later." He said with with a grin, and that sickly-sweet tone that you now despise. A sharp pain came from your neck, "FUCK YOU" you hissed, and shot blindly, before the world went spiraling all over the place, and the familiar darkness took over your vision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not much character interaction here, I promise a lot more conversation in the next chapter! Comment your thoughts on this one? ^^


	3. Why The Pressure?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter number three features:
> 
> -You questioning your life decisions™

"Tell me, who DO you work for?"

 

"Gonna have to figure that one out yourself." You responded nonchalantly, being careful not to express much emotion or actually move. Doing any of the two would probably make you crack and/or have an attack. Your eyes were scanning the room, looking for a way out. Unfortunately, the windowless concrete room had no possible exit except for the door behind the man who was interrogating you, Moriarty. The door itself could go both ways, you've seen them before.

 

You two were playing a game of some sort, one you dubbed: "Who'll Break First?", of course you knew it was going to be you. Sure you were smart, but this man is a genius. Besides, you were too busy looking for an escape to actually think of a way to 'win'. Moriarty however, was determined to make you talk, you had the reflexes of a cat, so of course you dodged when he threw a punch at you. The product of that wasn't very good on your part. You moved, which made you realize the reality of the situation, and so you panic.

 

'Holy shit I'm in the same room as the most dangerous man in England probably, I'm going to die holy FUCK' Are one of the many thoughts that flew through your mind in the past 2 seconds. Other thoughts include: 'shitshitshitshit' and 'what's he going to do to me fuck-SHIT this was a mistake' Your breathing started to become faster and deeper, and then it started to become harder to breathe at all. Your heart was beating against your chest, as if wanting to break free like one of those aliens. Your mind raced to find a way to get him out of here, it's bad enough that you had to have an attack now, how much worse would it be if he was watching?

 

Oh! Of course, normally these sort of arguments would never work, but it's worth a try. "Fine, fine. You caught me-" Wheeze. "Who hired me, I don't-" Wheeze. "know, but i'll find who it was-" Wheeze. "IF you give me some alone time with my laptop" WHEEZE. "for 15 minutes." And after one last wheeze, you laid back your arms behind the chair you were sitting on and relaxed your body. Tried to at least, your mind was still restless and you were getting nauseous, dreading the things that could happen, and sweating as if there was a fire in the room.

 

Moriarty looked entertained, you knew that he knew what was happening to you, and boy was he enjoying it. He gave you a look of thought, less serious and more playful. "Ten." "Thirteen?" You said less like a fact and more like a request. "Twelve-" "DEAL!" You yelled out, you were desperate to get him out of the room, and you didn't care if he enjoys whatever shit you're going through, you just want him out, and your laptop. 

 

The silence was killing you, and you HATE that he knew it, the fact that he relished your fear from the lack of stimulation makes your blood boil. Not that you can focus on that, the world was spinning too much. "Any longer than that and I will have you burned alive, and you better find out who hired you. Your twelve minutes starts now." Oh fuckity fuck you're into some deep water now, and oh shit is that your laptop? You hope it is because one part of your brain is busy with searching for the shithead that hired you.

 

Okay, the shithead, you've managed to get his or her IP address, found the city as to where it was sent, it was commisioned what, a day ago? Yup, confirmed on the details of the job itself, so you've got those down. Spying on Moriarty isn't the most average thing someone can request, so this is probably someone who wants to know what exactly he's up to, someone who has a reason to be concerned about this. So your average Joe isn't an option. The first thing that pops into your mind was someone from the government. Thinking was a bit hard when you were shaking and shivering like a leaf, Having an aching chest, and not being able to see properly.

 

Okay, okay. "Get your shit together Y/N, your fucking life is on the line." You muttered to yourself, or at least you hope so. Okay, so the city it was in doesn't have many rich or above-average residential homes, so the person probably lives out-of-town. You know, when you try to think about it, if a government official was to consult an illegal hacker, he/she would probably not do it themselves, a secretary maybe?

 

Yes! A secretary, okay time to make someone scared shitless

 

=============

 

Anthea? That's what they would tell you, but you know full-well who the fuck Anthea is. Sure it's not her real name, but it's what she identifies with, which destroys the point of having a fake name in the first place. But you've met her before, assistant of The British Government himself, Mycroft Holmes- HOLY SHIT GUESS WHO FIGURED IT OUT. And you only have half a minute left to try to calm yourself down, keyword: try. You motion to the camera that you're done, and not ten seconds later Mr. Asshole walks into the room.

 

Of course he finds a shivering mess on the floor, relieved to have saved your life, but you're still panicking. What if he kills you either way? Was that earlier threat empty? You don't fucking know, heck, you're not sure WHAT you know at the moment. Everything was shaking and spinning and morphing, it's all too much. You repeat your mantra that always managed to make you calmer. You managed to blurt out a few words to Jim Moriarty "One moment please" which was cut off by a wheeze.

 

"Take your time, we've got all day." He said, dragging out the words 'all' and 'day'. His voice laced with same toxicity that you remember from your first meeting. He stands there and waits for your attack to pass, what felt like hours were only seconds, but the pain was all the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoa that was long, hope it was good though! Comment down your thoughts to help me know what I can improve on!


	4. What Have You Gotten Yourself Into?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You have no idea what the actual fuck you're doing but fuck it.

“Honestly, what WAS that?”

 

“You know exactly what that was, asshole.”

 

You know what he was trying to do, it was fairly obvious as to what irritates you. Asking questions with an obvious answer was only one of them. Honestly, you must have no shame if you can still talk back to him after he just witness you have a panic attack. A very severe one at that, since you held back A LOT of emotions during that hacking segment, plus the stress from the previous day, were all unloaded at once. But then again, you never had any shame when it came to anything that involved your anxiety. And the people who did judge you/ express their unwanted opinion out loud either got: A beating, or a very degrading essay as to why they have no life and that they should widen their perspective on life in general.

 

You didn’t have the energy to do either of them to Jim however. That or you lack the guts to do so. 

 

“So?”

 

“So what you piece of shit?- oh! Right. I’d like to see you guess first.”

 

“So?” He repeated the question, but this time with a subtle tone of threat, and again, used with that same toxicity you hate so goddamn much that you’re pretty sure he know’s about it by now. You felt like playing smartass wouldn’t do your future self much good.

 

“It’s actually pretty obvious if you think about it, surprised you haven’t-” You cut yourself off, the look he gave you told you that you probably shouldn’t continue that line of thought. “Mycroft Holmes of course.” 

 

“By the way I did know.” He said with that weird, sort of rushed tone. It’s hard to describe really, everyone does it, but it’s rarely written into words. “I just liked watching you rush yourself to save your life.” He said, grinning evilly, which made you want to punch his face so, so bad. “And I wasn’t going to kill you-” “Yes, you wanted to, what was it? ‘Burn me alive’. Pft.” You mumbled to yourself. But like that of the nature of empty rooms, it bounced off the walls and made it so anyone in the room would have heard it.”-I wanted to make you a deal.” He said, completely ignoring your comment. Your jaw would have ‘dropped’, but a more proper word would have been ‘ajar’. 

 

“And what would said deal entitle?” You said, now standing up from your previous sitting position. Your curiosity was piqued, whatever it was, you weren’t going to accept, ever. Maybe probably. 

 

“I mean, you don’t really get a choice in this, you know what’ll happen if you say no-” “Just spit it out already.” You were obviously annoyed by this, which he knew. God, does this man know everything? Actually, now that you think about it, he probably does.

 

“I would like you to work for me- “As?” “-Patience. As a hacker of course; if that is the term you prefer?” You give him a look of disdain and approval. “In exchange for?” You ask, while at first thought, the answer seemed obvious. Money; but you feel that there’s something else going on here, oh right, it was obviously for-

 

“Protection of course, and not just from the fate that you’ll meet if you say no.”

 

Yes, that. Honestly, doing this job was one thing, leaving it behind and working for the worst person you could ever cross paths with is something else entirely. “Well I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” You asked as a sense of dread fills up your mind and body. ‘Depends on how much the salary is.’ you joked to yourself internally. You would have said it aloud but now’s probably not the right time to tell a joke. “Sure why not? It’s not like I have anything else to do.” You said, but it sounded as if you were trying to convince yourself, and not closing a deal with The Fucking Devil himself.

 

“When do I start?” You ask as if you were working an office job. But hey, anything to fill the painful silence than enveloped the room.

 

“Right when you shake my hand.” He said with that god awful smirk, Jesus Christ you want to choke his brains out so badly. You had to curl your hands into fists to resist the urge to actually do it. You sighed a sigh of regret, dread, and hatred as you look at his out-stretched hand; rolling your eyes, because what the actual fuck ARE you doing?

 

“Fuck you.” You said before shaking his hand, making your grip extra tight because this is the closes you’ll get to strangling the life out of him. “Good, honestly i’ve been cooped up in here for far too long. Want some tea?” This bastard better be joking because there is no way in Hell that he’s actually offering you to drink some _fucking tea_ with you. “Sure” You said following him out the door, despite your internal anger and confusion. And holy SHIT everything is falling apart, the ceiling, the wallpaper, the fucking floor. Where were you two anyways?

 

=========

 

Fuck this shit; actually, ‘this shit’ is nowhere near a good enough description as to what was happening. You were sharing tea with the world’s most dangerous criminal, you know, the usual. The interaction didn’t have much talking, which is actually good for you this time, as thoughts were flooding your mind more than ever, you were pretty sure you were disconnected from reality from that point on. Until of course, that fucking piece of shit said something.

 

“Anyways, since you work for me now, you might as well make yourself useful.” You choked on your tea, which was delicious by the way. You knew he didn’t mean that, there was no sense in it. But of course, he wanted to see your reaction, like a fucking asshole. You couldn’t help it, you debated the logic of his sentence, you haven’t had a debate in a while.

 

“Pft, ‘prove myself useful’? If I wasn’t useful in the first place, why would you have hired me? Exact-fucking-actly. You wouldn’t! It would not only waste your time, but also distract you. In the time it took you to ‘interrogate’ me, some serious shit could have happened, sure, maybe you’ve predicted all the possible scenarios that could have happened to whatever was going on at the time, but did you? One fucking different action would be all that it takes to destroy your plans. Oh! And if you didn’t have anything happening at the time, something could have! And i’m sure you’re smart enough to get that without me having to use complex-ass words to help you along the way.” And to finish it all off, you huffed at the man, a smirk of victory on your face.

 

“Colorful.” Is-is that it? Is that all he was going to say? wait, no. You saw what he did, yes you acknowledged that he was trying to get a reaction from you earlier, but did you listen to yourself? Nooo, and now you’re left unsatisfied and absolutely furious at the man. 

 

“You know what? Just contact me when you need something. I’m getting the fuck out of this shithole. See yah Jim.” You said as you strode out the room and through the exit. You recognize where you are, and it doesn’t take you long before you hailed a cabby. Inside you manage to get a break from Moriarty’s agonizing presence. You noticed that you weren’t as confident as you usually were, and more tense too.

 

Now that you think about it, the thing that unnerved you the most was how easily he trusted you to not run away. Was he that good at controlling other people’s lives? Apparently so, as you didn’t even attempt to escape. Heck, you even let down your guard when having tea with him, wait, you drank the tea without even checking if it was poisoned or not; Jesus Christ, what did he do?

 

He really was scary.


	5. Play a Game, Sherlock! 1/2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Set in TGG, Jim get’s called gay, yada yada. Second part of this is coming tomorrow!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eyyy, your relationship with Jim is improving. Long chapter in celebration of almost 100 hits! And it's only been 5 days, i'm so hyped!!

2AM, it was two in the morning, and you still aren’t tired. That and you’re still trying to process what you just did earlier. You sat on your bed, sipping a cup of coffee, you were working on deleting this guy’s records. You were going to get 600 pounds and some distraction for this, but it was done too soon. You were left on your bed without anything to do, you would have gone out and bought something, but almost no store was open at this hour. You decide to hack into the British Government, you know, for fun.

 

========

 

After almost two hours of illegal acts, you received a text from the piece of shit named Jim, and he wants you to go to an abandoned warehouse to test out something. Or well, you guessed, he only sent you the address, let’s hope you don’t get killed. Just in case however, you brought a gun, and told your friend to go there first. She wasn’t really your friend, you just keep someone in contact just in case you needed a test that may or may not involve death. It affected your morale a bit, which is why you faked a persona whenever you talked to them, and you picked out people who prefer to play on the side of the angels, which would guarantee them hating your real identity.

 

One taxi ride later, you went into the said warehouse, with a message left for you. You felt some sort of déjà vu, as another dead body greeted you, this time with a note that says: ‘Really?’. “Yes really you piece of shit, now what do you want?” You called out into the darkness. Striding forward, your eyes darting everywhere, you were alert as ever.

 

“Just wanted to try something out, needed someone to test it on of course.” A familiar voice answered, which seemed to come from everywhere, due to the walls of the warehouse. “And I assume that i’m that someone?” You said with a smirk, the thrill exciting you. But when a light turned on to reveal a man in a vest of bombs, who was deathly silent, but his eyes were telling you that he was asking for help. “Did you seriously put me in warehouse that has active bombs inside? I’m assuming you aren’t here then.” “Correct! Now I want you to read the paper on the ground, I know that you can read fast, and so i’ll give you an hour to solve it! Go wherever you need to, or else he goes boom!” He said as the voice cuts off. 

 

He got that part right, you can read fast. It was required for hacking. On the paper was a mystery, and it was written as such. You weren’t the type for mysteries, but if he was allowing you to go wherever you needed to go, then this is either: Fiction based in reality, or some old unsolved case. But when you read it, you knew immediately which one it was, as the title is “The Blue Carbuncle”.

 

========

 

Turns out, you had been wrong, the case has already been solved, though digging up information on it had been hard, as there was no such thing as the Internet back then, but it was written in a book, and then re-written onto some guy’s website, you simply read the story, went back to that godforsaken warehouse.

 

“Hey asshole, I’ve still got fifteen minutes to spare, it really wasn’t that hard. James Ryder put the gem into the geese’s throat, now let the poor guy go for God’s sake.” You said nonchalantly, you avoided looking at the man, the beeping of the bombs terrified you. But then it stopped, he disabled the bombs. You sighed and removed the jacket from him, he was too scared to move of course. “Go on-scram!” You barked out at him, which obviously made him run away; he runs weird. You received a text from him,which only annoyed you further.

 

“I made it easy for you of course. -JM"

Instead of getting angry, you were curious.

 

“What was that for anyways?-” No, you knew what it was for.

 

“Who was that for anyways? -Y/I”

 

That was the right question, you were assuming it was someone smart because of the mystery. You had a hunch as to who it was.

 

“If it’s for who I think it is, maybe have the victims talk for you, it adds more pressure. -Y/I” You added, it was just a random thought, you know from experience that hearing the voice of someone in danger makes you rush a bit faster. Jim didn’t respond immediately, it was when you got home you received your response; not in the from of a text however. Sitting on your couch was Number One Asshole: Jim Moriarty.

 

You really should stop referring to him as ‘Asshole’, but then again he could have blown you up. “Hello, didn’t expect you to be here.” You said with a scowl, i’m surprised as to how you’re not dead yet. Guess he just has a high tolerance for insults; he was asshole of the year after all. “But then again, no one does do they? nobody ever expects the worst. Anyways, what the fuck are you doing here?” You asked, the annoyance in your voice as obvious as ever.

 

“Your couch is very comfy-” “It’s from Ikea, now answer the goddamn question Jim.” You yelled out from your kitchen, you were making some tea, you remembered what he drank from before, might as well treat your guest with some form of respect.

 

“You know, you did very well earlier. How’d you figure it out?” The fact that he’s complimenting you makes you want to stab him in the heart, again, not a very good idea. “I recognized the name of course, read it in a book some time ago.” You decided to answer, your memory was pretty good. learning how to do advanced coding helped train it. When the tea was done, you sat down and offered it to Moriarty. “I have good memory..” You said softly, answering the question he was asking in his mind. 

 

“You don’t feel like a face-to-face kind of person. Why _do_ you keep on meeting me?” You asked, it’s been bugging you ever since you saw him on the couch. “You don’t trust people without faces, I wanted your trust of course.” He said matter-of-factly. Which only confused you further. “Why?” You said with a sort of laugh, you tend to do that when you’re nervous. “Fear doesn’t work with you, i’ve tried it before; the result was one more dead body to get rid of.”

 

Oh shit, he was talking about Dante. You got a job the other month, well it was less of a job and more of a threat. A person only known as Dante asked you to find and kill someone for him, you accepted the locating part, but for what he was paying, it wasn’t going to cut the killing. He told you that he was going to hunt you down, destroy your home, and kill you slowly; literally. His text read out:

“If you do not do this job, I will find you, destroy your home, and kill you as slowly as possible.

-D”, quite the drama queen really.

 

He wasn’t the most.. careful person you’ve ever met. He wasn’t very wary about his security, so tracking down the bastard was easy. You hired an assassin to take him out, and it was done within a day. You guessed that Moriarty hired him to do that, in which case, he’s probably known about you for a long time. There were several other attempts at scaring you, but that one was the very, very first time. “Oh.” You said, your eyes twinkled with thoughtfulness, it’s only been two days, but Jesus Christ too many things have gone on. Wait, what time is it?

 

You checked your watch, and.. it’s almost.. 5... AM. “Why are you still up on this ungodly hour?” You ask, feigning offense; because you have no honest idea as to what you should be feeling right now. “Why are you?” he retorted, and for some godforsaken reason, it was absolutely hilarious to you at the time. So obviously, you laughed hysterically, everyone within a 100 feet radius would’ve heard you. “AHAHAHAHAH- You should- you should probably get out of here- pftt ahAHAHAH-” You chuckled, cutting yourself off by covering your had with a pillow, the sleep deprivation is getting to you. When you calmed down a few second later, you looked behind your sofa to find Jim leaving your flat, and swear you saw the trace of a smile on the side of his face.

 

When he left, you looked back at the coffee table in front of you, only to find a missing teacup, and a note. You picked it up, walked into your bedroom, put it on your desk, and threw yourself onto the bed.

 

=======

When you woke up around 3 hours later, you were surprisingly energetic. you were about to start your normal daily routine when you received a text from the only person who actually contacts you. Which turns out to be the person you sort of hate. You lazily looked at your phone and read the message. 

 

“Check your mail. -JM”

 

You were about to, but then you remembered about the note from last night-err, earlier. You read it quietly while walking out of your room, ‘Set these up at 221B Baker St. Pretend you’re a friend.’, you were assuming that it was about the mail, but you couldn’t focus on that right now, his handwriting was angelic, like holy shit, how is it possible to have handwriting this good? You put down the note after a few seconds of thinking about his impossible handwriting. You headed down to the first floor of your apartment building and opened your PO box. Inside was a box, it was addressed to you.

 

You took it up into your room on the second floor, and immediately opened it up with your only pair of scissors. Inside the box was one note. One small note. Written on it was an address, guess you’re going out today, it was a shame, you wanted to do something else, but if he was putting **this** much dedication into it, you might not want to disappoint him.

 

=======

 

After arriving at said address, you entered the building to be greeted by a shady looking man, good thing you still have your gun with you. “Erm, I was told to go here?”, you asked, not bothering to fake confidence, you had an advantage over him anyways. “Name?” Fuck, should you tell him? Eh, you’ll just shoot him in the foot if he doesn’t let you in anyways, so why not. “Y/N. Sound familiar?” You asked, feigning authority over the shithead, to which he responded with ‘fear’, huh. He shrank away a bit, and you could smell the sweat from his forehead. But was it from fear? No, it felt more like nervousness. “Right! Sorry..” He said with a much weaker tone, not the best actor you must admit.

 

You knew what he was doing, he was going to take you down from behind, pretending to let you in. You sighed, took out your gun, and shot him on the foot in one swift movement. “Bloody hell, learn how to act before attempting something like that, it’ll never work if you don’t.” You strode past him, gun in hand. There was one room to your right, you peeked over the door frame before going in.. empty, except for a few things on the floor. An open box, tape, and a note. Why were there so many fucking notes? 

 

The note had the same angelic handwriting as the last one, so probably from Jim as well. ‘Get it done by 2, don’t disappoint me.”, what a fucking prick. When you looked into the box, inside were small, black spheres, which you knew to be bombs. These kinds were hard as fuck to obtain, how he got his hands on these, you would probably never know, but just being near them makes you giddy. They’re known as “Imps”, they’re small, but have the power of your average explosive, not lethal unless you’re close as fuck to it. 

 

Then you remembered the text, 221B is Sherlock’s flat, which leads you to believe that your hunch from last night was right. You assume the tape was for the box, so you do that, and make your way out of the building. “Taxi!”

 

=======

 

When you arrive at 221 Baker Street, you knock on the door, you’ve already sorted out your persona during the ride to get here, so all you need to do now is to act. “Hello! Um, i’m a friend of Sherlock, I just need to drop something off at his flat, i’ll be quick! I promise!” You said with a cheery smile, Mrs. Hudson was obviously charmed by your happy demeanor, and let you in immediately. “Do you have keys? He didn’t give me his so um.” “Of course dear! Stay there for a second, i’ll go and get them.” She said, this was easier than you thought. This won’t be as easy next time.

 

When you entered the empty room, you started to place the bombs, the adhesive on the bottom stuck onto the walls and furniture you put them on. Now since Moriarty doesn’t intend for Sherlock to die, you put them on the wall opposite the fireplace, there would be no reason for him to lean on it, at least you hope so. Holding the bombs in your hands made you both nervous and excited. By 1:30 you were done with the bombs,left the flat, and on the way to your’s.

 

“Done and done. Anything else? -Y/I” You texted, you hope that you wouldn’t have to do anything else, the addresses were tiring. Before you even finished a thought, he already responded.

 

“Want to watch Sherlock call me gay? -JM” What. You were confused but also somewhat thrilled? His description was so vague that it made you excited as to how it would play out. Shopping can wait, this is going to be fun.

 

“What do I have to do? -Y/I” Bloody hell this is going to be absolutely spectacular.

 

“Good. Show up at Scotland Yard an hour after it goes boom, impress him, he’ll let you tag along. See you at the lab ;) -JM” What the fuck did that mean? You understood the first part, but what did he mean ‘impress’, show off your intelligence or something? Probably. Ah well, you’re gonna have to be fake partners with Sherlock Holmes, can’t wait.

 

=======

 

You turned on the news to find that your carefully placed explosives had worked, it was reported as a gas leak, but you knew better. Now you had to wait an hour, might as well get dressed. And by ‘get dressed’, you meant to wear something decent, and not just old shorts and a dirty shirt. Now, if you’re going to charm Sherlock to see you as a good enough person that he’ll let you tag along, you’re going to have to be witty, and distant. People often like other people who resemble themselves. But you can’t completely act like him, you should also resemble John Watson, the only person he considers a friend.

 

So you’re basically a mix of both, perfect. Thirty minutes passed, almost there. You put on your shoes, ankle-length combat boots to be exact. Normally you would have sneakers on, but these are a bit more professional, but not like, professional. You waited another ten minutes before throwing on your coat, and walking out of the room. This was your third taxi today, and this time it’s going to the station. Which station? The one Sherlock’s about to go to right now of course, Scotland Yard.

 

In your earlier free time, you managed to hack yourself a new identity, Detective Jane Morris. You’re there to help investigate, they’d ask you why, and then it’s game time. You arrived at the station, put on your fake glasses, and strode inside. You weaved through the desks and workers, you saw Sherlock and John as well, perfect timing.

 

“Excuse me, Greg Lestrade? I’m here to investigate.” You said, once again faking a sense of authority and confidence. “Investigate what? And who the hell are you?” He asked, obviously confused by your sudden appearance, you felt butterflies in your stomach. “Detective Jane Morris sir, came here on my own accord. You’ll see what we’re going to investigate later.” You said just as Sherlock and John entered the room. “Sherlock! Oh you’ll love this. That explosion-” “Gas leak, yes?” “no-” “No?” “-No, made to look like one.” You had to resist the urge to smirk at the topic. “What?” John said with obvious confusion. He’s actually pretty cute. “Hardly anything left, except a strongbox, a very strong box, and inside of it is this.” Greg said holding up an envelope.

 

“You haven’t opened it?” Sherlock inquired. “Well it’s addressed to you isn’t it? We’ve X-rayed it, it’s not booby-trapped.” Lestrade said. “How reassuring.” Said Sherlock with his dull tone. “What are you doing here?” Sherlock asked, to you this time. “Oh, i’m here to investigate. Jane Morris, detective. If you’re going to ask what i’ll be investigating, open the envelope.” You answered, not bothering to spare him the details. He looked at you in thought, you smiled clumsily at him. “Nice stationery.” He commented. “Bohemian.” You finished with a smirk, “How’d you know that?” He asked, obviously taken aback a bit. “It’s from the Czech Republic. There aren’t any finger prints, but she used a fountain pen. Parker Duofold, with a Meridian nib.” You said with the same clumsy smile from earlier, he was obviously impressed but also confused as to how you knew that.

 

John asked why ‘she’, but Sherlock answered that for him. Sherlock opens the letter, plays the bips, shows the photo, and you four are on your way. You’re careful not to look at Mrs. Hudson this time, but she only saw your cheery behavior from earlier, now you were aloof, and you weren’t even looking at her for god’s sake.

 

=======

 

Okay, so you finally get what Jim was talking about, this was the lab you were going to see him in. Bloody hell you’re excited. Sherlock finally found something, and Molly, you assume bursts in. “Any luck?” She basically yelled excitedly. But the thing that baffled you was the next person who came in. You could hardly believe that it was Jim, for one, he wasn’t wearing a suit, and two, he’s acting so... different, god you should take acting lessons from him.

 

Wait holy shit they’re dating? Jim is dating Molly oh my god, how is Jim this good at acting? And you see now why he’s ‘gay’. Obvious to say the least. You introduced yourself to Jim, trying so, so hard not to laugh. But the first rule of acting was to never break character in the middle of filming. “I’m Jane Morris, i’m a detective.” You said with your trade marked clumsy smile. “Hi, i’m Jim!” He said happily, dear lord it was so hard not to laugh, this was too much. Just look at his _hair._

 

“Hi, so you’re Sherlock Holmes, Molly’s told me all about you. You on one of your cases?” By god, why does he talk like that? “Jim works in IT upstairs. That’s how we met. Office romance” Yes Molly, it was obvious from the way you greeted him to how you’re getting close to him. Did he chuckle? Jim doesn’t chuckle what the fuck? “Gay” Sherlock finally mumbled under his breath. Okay, you couldn’t hold it in anymore, you let out one laugh and successfully passed it off as a cough.

 

Bloody hell he dropped something and- wait. He slipped his number under there holy shit Jim, what the fuck. “Well i’d better be off.” “Erm, excuse me I need to do something real quick.” You said before rushing after the asshole. When you finally exited the room, you went into the restroom, and absolutely lost it. This day is actually the best.

 

=======

 

You’re sure Sherlock would’ve gotten the puzzle by now, he only has 4 hours left. And you were right. Jim’s currently updating you live, like actually live. The two of you are at the same place, at once, and he was talking to you. You couldn’t get over the fact that The Devil actually used your recommendation of having the victims talk for him. You set him up with the chat room, since he could be traced with normal messaging. You tagged along with him after the whole lab thing.

 

You don’t plan on acting as a friend for Sherlock again, besides, you were going to reveal your identity tomorrow anyways. Now that you have some time to actually talk to Jim, you obviously brought up his disguise earlier. He ignored you, so you brought up something else.

 

“How’d you charm Molly into liking your persona? If I was being honest, it was kind of.. not likeable? I saw that it could work for a short time, your persona and Molly, but long-term? Actually the only impossible thing in the universe.” You rambled for a bit. Jim, who was sitting on the couch in front of the one you’re sitting on, ignored you. Well he smirked, like he always does. Then he looked up at you, “Did I do good though?” The only thing bigger than his ego is probably the sun.

 

“Good? You did bloody excellent! It was like an entirely different person! Wait-” He was smirking, his eyebrows are raised, what does this mean? Fuck this, it was late and you’re sleep deprived. "Text me when it's time, I feel like death itself and would love some sleep.” You said not with real annoyance in your voice, this time it was fake. You’ve gotten accustomed to his presence, he was rather nice when wasn’t trying to kill anyone and/or just playful in general.

 

The next three days are going to be absolutely horrible.

 

=======

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jim was right, you do trust people easily whenever you meet with them face-to-face often.


	6. Play a Game, Sherlock! 2/2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two of The Great Game. The famous pool scene has arrived! Another long chapter for the celebrations of over 100 hits! Thanks so much you guys!

You’ve finally gotten a reasonable amount of sleep, you awaken thinking about the previous day’s events, grinning at the thought of what’s going to happen later. When you were asked to set up the system for The Game, you only asked one thing for payment: You get to type for the second round. Not the third or fourth however, you couldn’t bear to hear the voices of the hostages for them. While thinking about yesterday, you thought about how you acted. The more you thought about your behavior, the more confused you were.

 

Yesterday was very, very overwhelming, and you guessed that your way of coping with that was to not give a damn, it was like the whole Jim Moriarty thing humanized you a bit, or well, the more appropriate way to describe it is that it made you more laid back. You ponder as to why, maybe it was fear? No, you were quite sure that that wasn’t the reason, maybe it was your interactions with him? You haven’t talked to a lot of people recently, and you did have some form of fun with him. You thought about what you just said in your head, fun? He was a dangerous criminal god dammit, he could have been faking for all you know.

 

You start to worry, had you fallen for yet another trick? Did you let your emotions get in the way of your logic? While the thought is painful, the possibility was there, and it only made you anxious once more. From now on, you weren’t going to let your guard down. You had changed so much yesterday, you couldn’t even follow simple instructions from yourself. What happened to your made up identity yesterday? You didn’t stick to it that much, the only thing you did was predict what Sherlock would have said, no acting, nothing.

 

You couldn’t bear to be fooled again, not by Moriarty, not by yourself. Today’s going to be different. You quickly did your usual routine and got dressed, prepared breakfast and made some coffee for yourself. You sat down on your couch, booted up your laptop, and played some music. You scrolled through your list of jobs, why was everything so boring? You stuck with reading a book instead.

 

=======

 

After a solid hour of reading, you got a text from Asshole number one. What a shame, you were getting to the good part too.

“Ready.

-JM” Oh, right. You quickly logged into the chatroom, and connected to the call without actually joining. You did the same for Jim, time to finally do some real acting. Moriarty wasn’t the easiest personality to act as, but you did your best. You started typing to the sobbing man, which then read it aloud to Sherlock. You tried your best to remain serious, composing yourself, you put yourself in the shoes of Jim Moriarty, the Napoleon of Crime.

 

Faking psychopathy was something that you’re used to, as you had to do the same in several other situations, so it wasn’t hard to get that side of him. You were sure that you nailed it, the “I never liked him. Carl laughed at me. So I stopped him laughing.” part was pretty spot on, you had to give yourself that. Moriarty gave you some direction as to what you were supposed to say, and of course he didn’t give you a reason why however, like a prick.

 

Once the call was done, you continued with your music and book as if nothing happened, you predict that the duo’ll solve the case later tonight, so for now, you have some free time to yourself. And when they’re finally done with the case, you’re going to set up some more explosives. This time, they aren’t very small.

 

=======

 

You put on a sweater and jacket as it was a particularly cold night, picked up your box of goodies, and hailed a taxi. On the way to the poor old lady’s flat, you thought about why you were the one who set up the bombs. They made you anxious. You were supposed to put these all on one floor, poor old lady didn’t deserve to die, but you had no say in the matter, it was either do this or spend the rest of your life running away from the most dangerous man in England.

 

Once on the required floor, you posed as a tenant that lived there, while setting up an explosive on each door. You knocked on the lady’s door, she was blind, so it should be easy to do this. You weren’t going to put the vest onto her yet, it was too early, no, you just put some in her room. After you were done with that, you put the rest hidden on the ceiling and some on the floor, for good measure. You were happy that you weren’t responsible for the trigger on these.

 

You picked up some groceries on the way home, you were running out of milk. You didn’t sleep too late that night, just finished your book, drank some warm chocolate milk, and slept, or tried to. Your mind was restless from anxiety, you were suppressing so much of it yesterday that it affected your behavior. It was no surprise that you were worrying so much today.

 

=======

 

When you woke up, you didn’t feel like you even slept, you felt absolutely miserable, you sighed and decided to do some work before taking a shower, that should help you get productive. This one guy wants you to absolutely destroy someone’s life for 1500, which you gracefully accepted. You started by giving the target a criminal record, a very ugly one at that. In fact, you put that he was required to wear an ankle brace, which he doesn’t have on right now, so that’s going to be fun for him. Oh? He has a wife? You reached out to her and tried to bribe her with money to get a divorce.

 

When that didn’t work, you threatened her with the promise of killing her and everyone she loves if she doesn’t get a divorce, and if she tries to tell the police or anyone else about it, you’ll know. Normal people usually get scared with threats like those, and sure enough, it works. Well now that you’ve told her that, you hire some criminals near her area to keep an eye on her and her soon-to-be ex husband. You felt a tinge of guilt, but you soon distracted yourself with a shower and some cereal.

 

When you were done, it was about time for the third puzzle, you shot Jim a text and connected him with the call and chatroom. You couldn’t give less of a damn for what he’ll type, so you grabbed the book you bought last night, you had your eye on this one for a while. It was by your favorite author too.

 

=======

 

 

Dear lord, those explosives really did pack a punch. It took out the floor above and below it. Apparently, Sherlock solved the puzzle, but when our hostage started describing Jim’s voice, the trigger had to be pulled. The fourth and basically last puzzle took place almost immediately after, you didn’t have any part in this, You decided it was time for some early dinner, you were starving.

 

You went out to this one Chinese place near your flat. Music was blaring in your headphones, today was rest day. You sat down in your usual seat, and ate. You didn’t think about much, that was until a black, expensive-looking car pulled up in front of the building. Good thing you brought your gun wherever you went, that and the fact that you knew a few tricks. You pulled out your laptop from your backpack, booted it up, and typed in the car’s plate number.

 

You were planning to hack into the DVLA later and found out who drove said car, before someone walked out of the driver’s seat. You recognized him as married, you can use that as blackmail later, he had an athletic body, dressed in a fancy suit, but he doesn’t look like the kind of man who would buy a car like that. He pushed the door without putting much effort, and that door was pretty damn heavy, so he must work out. Possibly MI6 agent or a bodyguard of some sort. You were leaning more on the bodyguard option, an MI6 agent wouldn’t dress out of the ordinary like that.

 

Why’d you guess MI6? Because that happened before. The British Government isn’t that ignorant, you were being a bit more careless than usual, and of course, you were found out temporarily. You almost had a panic attack then, what would have happened? You, only known as The Hound, found out to actually be Y/N. You fixed that immediately of course, making it seem like you were the wrong person, crafting a completely different identity for it. The man had walked to you, which made you grab your gun under your coat, you kept your gaze on him, watching his every move.

 

“And who might you be?” You asked, narrowing your eyes in suspicion. “Y/N?” He asked, emotionless. “Yeah, why? Have I gotten a fan?” You asked playfully, what could this be? “I’ve been sent to give you this.” He sort of answered, as he handed you a box. Why are there so many goddamn boxes in your life? You were betting that there was also a note in this one. When he gave you the box however, he just straight up left. Was this it? He drove all the way here to give you one box?

 

Wait, you suddenly became tense, what could possibly be in this box that was so important? Exactly, death. Your death to be exact. There was a huge possibility that the box was booby-trapped, so you immediately packed up your things and hailed a cab, you were going to have to X-Ray this little ‘Gift’.

 

=======

 

That was a relief, no bombs, you also checked for poison, almost every kind. None at all. When you finally deemed it safe enough to open, inside was the most disappointing thing you could ever imagine after hours of hard work. _**One. Fucking. Note.** _Of course! Your hatred for Jim Moriarty had returned, you two were officially enemies now. No one’s going to change that. You sighed heavily and went outside of your 'friend’‘s lab, and hailed yet another cab.__

__

__You thought about tomorrow, and about the time. It was ten o’ clock, about time for some sleep. When you arrived at your flat, you actually bothered to change into different clothes rather than just pass out on your bed. You brushed your teeth lazily and finally hid under your covers. You turned off your bedside table lamp, and set the alarm at.. actually, no alarm for tomorrow. The main event is at night after all._ _

__

__=======_ _

__

__Tomorrow evening, 10PM. Apparently, you’ve gotten stuck with the bombs again. This time you were also going to kidnap someone. Jesus Christ, you were told to be a hacker, not a fucking well-rounded criminal. It wasn’t really kidnaping per se, more like tricking someone. You were supposed to get John to the pool, knock him put for a bit, strap the bomb vest onto him, and position yourself. You held the controls for the explosives, so you had the power to disable them, and trigger them._ _

__

__Sherlock was coming over at midnight, so you don’t have much time left, 12, 9 minutes left? You weren’t quite sure. Before he came, you waited for him on the upper level, laptop open and controls in front of you; you were wrong however he came in earlier than expected. He didn’t notice you of course, you were deathly silent, but you kept a close watch on him. “Brought you a little, getting-to-know-you present. That’s what it’s all been for isn’t it? All your little puzzles, making me dance. All to distract me from this.” That had been John’s cue to come out. Here comes the fun part._ _

__

__“Evening. This is a turn-up, isn’t it Sherlock?” You tried not to smirk, but your giddiness got the best of you. “Bet you never saw this coming. What would you like me to make him say.. next?” OH HELL YEAH. Sherlock’s reaction was priceless, you’ve never seen his confused expression before, it was great. “Gottle o’ gear, gottle o’ gear, gottle o’ gear.” Look at his worried reaction! You’ve never seen him caring so much before!_ _

__

__A few more lines from John- er, Jim later, came the best part. Jim from IT, turns out to be Moriarty! How exciting. “I gave you my number. I thought you might call.” He said, slightly distorting his voice. “Jim Moriarty. Hi” You couldn’t hold it in anymore, you let out a snort; which attracted their attention to you, your face now visible from the light of your laptop. “Heyy, remember me?” You announced, giving Sherlock that fake, clumsy grin. “You’re that detective.. which apparently you aren’t.” He said, deducing that you were only acting then._ _

__

__“Yeah.. sorry to disappoint you bud, no one named Jane Morris exists, probably.” You said, which you then followed up with “I work for him by the way.” as you pointed to Jim. “I hate him” you added, it felt important at the time. Oddly enough, Sherlock kept his gun locked onto Jim. “Yes, yes, enough about you.” Jim drawled annoyingly. “Do you remember me? Did I make such a fleeting impression? But then I suppose, that was rather the point. Don’t be silly, someone else is holding the trigger.” Jim announced much faster._ _

__

__“That would be me. Y/N.” You snickered, which then made Sherlock point the gun at you. “Don’t be ridiculous, we all know that you can’t shoot me from down there.” You piped. “Want to test the credibility of that statement?” Sherlock then responded. “I’d love to.” You then grinned. “I don’t like getting my hands dirty. I’ve given you a glimpse Sherlock. Just a teensy glimpse, of what i’ve got going on out there in the big bad world. I’m a specialist, you see. Like you.-” “And me of course.” You cut him off. Y’know, just to piss him off. “Dear Jim, please will you fix it for me, to get rid of my lover’s nasty sister? Dear Y/N, will you please fix it for me to disappear to South America?” Sherlock answered. “Just so.” “Sounds right to me.” The two of you said in unison. “Consulting criminals-” “I prefer the term ‘hacker’ if you don’t mind. I don’t usually do this sort of thing.” You chimed in quickly. “Brilliant.” Sherlock admitted. “Isn’t it?” Jim responded back._ _

__

__“No-one ever gets to me. And no-one ever will-” “I did” Sherlock said as he cocked the gun. “That’s where you’re, in fact, wrong. You’ve come the closest, that’s for sure. And now, you’re just in his way.” You gracefully answered for Jim, just to peeve him again. “Thank you-” “She didn’t mean it as a compliment.” “Yes she did.” “Yeah okay she did.” He said mockingly._ _

__

__“But the flirting’s over Sherlock. Daddy’s had enough now.” He sang playfully. You almost choked from his choice of words. What the fuck Jim? “I’ve shown you what I can do. I cut loose all those people.-” “All their little problems.” You finished. “Even 30 Million quid just to get you to come out and play.” “Word of advice: You should take this as a friendly warning Sherlock, back off.” You and Jim said the last part together in unison._ _

__

__“Although I have loved this, this little game of ours. Playing Jim from IT. Playing gay. Did you like the little touch with the underwear?” Yes Jim, you did like that touch. “People have died.” Shit that was a mistake, bad choice of words, here we go.. “That’s what people DO!” By God, he shouts really loud. You made sure to put that on your ‘Don’t do’ list. Don’t piss Jim Moriarty off. “I will stop you.” “No you won’t” You sang quietly._ _

__

__\-------_ _

__

__“Sherlock run!” What a surprising turn of events! Not. “Oh! Good! very good.” “If your hacker detonates these bombs Mr. Moriarty, then we both go up.” John whispered. “Isn’t he sweet? I can see why you like to have him around. But then, people get so sentimental about their pets, they’re so touchingly loyal. But oops! You’ve rather shown your hand there, Dr. Watson.” Moriarty laughed. What a fucking psychopath.And oh? What’s this? Looks like there’s a sniper, and he’s currently aiming at Sherlock._ _

__

__\-------_ _

__

__“Do you know what happens if you don’t leave me alone Sherlock? To you?” “Oh let me guess, you’ll have me killed.” “Kill you? No don’t be obvious. I mean, I am going to kill you anyway, some day. I don’t want to rush it though. I’m saving it up for something special. No, no, no, no. If you don’t stop prying, i’ll burn you. I’ll burn, the heart out of you.” Dear lord, even that freaked you out a little. “I have been reliably informed that I don’t have one.” Jesus Christ that sounds like shit. “But we all know that’s not quite true.”_ _

__

__“Well, i’d better be off. Well, so nice to have had a proper chat.” “What if I was to shoot you now? Right now.” Sherlock asked, but it felt more like a threat. “Then you could cherish the look of surprise on my face. ‘Cos i’d be surprised Sherlock. I really would.” You stopped talking, instead you were listening intently. Observing their every movement, as if this was a play. “And just a teensy bit...disappointed. And of course you wouldn’t be able to cherish it for very long.”_ _

__

__“Ciao, Sherlock Holmes. Come on Y/N.” You quickly packed your laptop and practically jumped off the stairs. You looked at Sherlock on the way out. Just a look. No emotion behind it, but inside you were dead scared. “Catch you... later.” You heard Sherlock say. “No you won’t!” You and Moriarty said in unison once again._ _

__

__\-------_ _

__

__“I’m so changeable!” Jim yelled cheerfully as you once again, unpack your laptop, opened the controls, and watched. “It is a weakness with me. But to be fair to myself, it is my only weakness. You can’t be allowed to continue. You just can’t.” He bubbled. You typed in the command to disable the explosives, just in case. You hadn’t entered it yet, but you kept it ready._ _

__

__“I would try to convince you, but everything I have to say has already crossed your mind.” I mean, it wasn’t wrong. “Probably my answer has crossed yours.” Sherlock pointed the gun at Jim, but then to the explosives. You had your finger on the enter button,you gave a quick look of approval at Jim before looking back at Sherlock._ _

__

__Dear lord, this’ll be fun._ _


	7. A Series of Running Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I didn't update yesterday! School kept me busy. Short chapter today, so sorry!

You looked once again at the screen in front of you, yup, bomb’s still active. You had to count on your reflexes to save your life on this one, why are you always the one with the bombs? You were alert of every sound and movement in the room, your heart was practically out of your chest at this point, you felt your short life flash before your eyes, whatever happy memories you had, you saw them all in a second.

 

Everything felt tense, that was until Jim’s phone started to ring. And not just any ringtone played, but it was _his_ ringtone. You know, Stayin’ Alive. Which was honestly very ironic. You gave a deep sigh and muttered “Jesus Christ” to yourself. You looked at Jim with both anger and confusion, what the fuck James?

 

“Do you mind if I get that?” “Yes, yes I very much mind.” You said with hatred and irritation, learn how to silence your phone you piece of shit. “I wasn’t talking to you.” You mocked his tone while making a face, your whole life was in danger, did he expect for you to just brush it off? “Oh no please. You’ve got the rest of your life.” Jesus fuck, don’t encourage him! “Hello?” You sighed one more time before working on tracing the call.

 

It was successfully traced to Number 44 Eaton Square, Irene Adler’s place of residence. Because of that, you were to assume that she was the one calling, why? You’ll soon know. “Yes of course it is. What do you want?” He sounds weird when he’s being somewhat polite, he has a much lighter tone, his face says the opposite however. “SAY THAT AGAIN!” “Jesus fuck, what the hell Jim?” You said getting quieter with each word, no one could hear you by the time you said ‘Jim’.

 

“Say that again, and know that if you’re lying to me, I will find you, and I will skin you. You looked at him in disapproval, you aren’t going to be joining that last part. “Wait.” His tone has gotten somewhat more normal now. His voice regained that toxicity that you remember all too well. 

 

He walked forward, looking more hateful than usual.”Sorry.. Wrong day to die.” You muttered a “thank god.”, but quickly recovered with “I-I mean- shit-”in which case, you had not recovered at all, and deciding to go with your gut, quickly packed your stuff, and dashed out of there. Like a literal dash, you were out of there in two seconds, nowhere to be found.

 

=======

 

“Y/N! Where are you?~” You heard him say with a sing-song voice. You almost instinctively answered with “Not here that’s for sure.” As you stare, no longer distracted by your laptop. Bad move. “There you are, now tell me, who called me earlier?” He didn’t even look in your general direction, how’d he find you?

 

“Irene Adler of course, though you might have guessed from her voice.” You said almost instantly, your ego getting the best of you. “No, no, no. _who_ was she?” To that you blushed, really hard. There was no way you were going to explain _Irene fucking Adler’s_ job to **James ‘Jim’ Moriarty.**

 

Your only response was a hum of embarrassment and “No can do sir, by the way, there’s this new café down the block somewhere, I was looking forward to checking it out, see you-” You said as you hurriedly fixed your knapsack and grabbed your coat on the way out. Not today Mr. James Moriarty.

 

Not. Today.


	8. Fire and Anger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're very angry

You were sitting quietly in a café, apparently, there was a new café nearby. It’s coffee was quite good too. You were sipping your coffee and browsing twitter on your phone, not being able to stop thinking about earlier. Your mind was brainstorming ideas of how to explain Irene Adler to James, it seemed impossible really. You were distracted from your thoughts when you saw a car pull up in front of the café, again.

 

This is why you bring your gun everywhere. You hold it underneath your coat, finishing your coffee quickly before leaving. You sharply turned to your right, briskly walking away from the car. You didn’t hear anything, so you changed your pace erratically and finally, you heard the person’s heavy footsteps. Very heavy. The sound made you think that maybe confronting him wasn’t the best idea.

 

Going to your flat wasn’t the best idea, so your mind went to the store nearby, you spent a lot of time there, your creative and anxious mind often imagined situations where you were attacked in said store, so you’d know what to do. You set your eyes on the building, grinning a bit as to what’s about happen next. When you entered you quickly said sorry to the manager who was currently working the cash register.

 

When you sensed the person enter, you suddenly turned behind you while pulling out your gun, the woman wasn’t as fast however. You took the opportunity to jab her and pin her to the ground. “Hello there, how may I help you?” You hissed at her, which only made her narrow her eyes, those were pretty eyes.You frowned at the thought, no, you were going to have to take this seriously. “I was only sent here to pick you up, now let go of me.” She answered nonchalantly, her voice was pretty deep.

 

“By whom?” You asked with curiosity, you hope it wasn’t who you think it is. “You’d know him-” “Well tell him, that if he wants me, he’s going to have to try a little harder.” You said quickly before scurrying out of there, but it was true. You weren’t going to accept so easily, you’ll only go if he tells you directly, or by force. “Ah, but do I have to?” You heard a voice say, the voice of the man you bumped into after rushing out of the store.

 

Naturally, you drew your gun on the man, but when you opened your eyes, you were greeted by the person you dreaded the most. “Oh goddammit, what do you want now?” You once again hissed, this man was irritating. “I need you to hack into someone’s phone for me.” You gave him an annoyed look. “Please?-” “Okay, fine, fine. Leave me alone in my flat for a week or two, i’ll try to have it done by then.”

 

He gave you a faked guilty look. “What? What the fuck did.. You.. do?” You said while turning around to see what he was looking at. The TV inside the store was playing a news report, and it wasn’t very pretty. Apparently, your flat was on fire. You saw that it was more concentrated on your floor. The fire however, was nothing in comparison to your reaction. “What. the. FUCK? Your poor ass better start running or else I WILL DISEMBOWEL YOU AND TEAR YOU PART BY PART! You bellowed.

 

“I seriously doubt that.” He basically mumbled in comparison to your voice, he was grinning madly, he really shouldn’t be. “STOP GRINNING YOU EGOTISTICAL PIECE OF SHIT.” You howled, you felt your blood boil inside your veins, you paced back and forth, where will you live now? What about your stuff? Your laptop?- “Hold on, hold on, hold on, what did you do to my laptop- holy shit- there’s no way in hell-” “Oh, but is there-” “DO NOT. PLAY MIND GAMES WITH ME-” Almost everything you have is on that damned laptop, heck, you were planning to replace it soon.

 

You started to hyperventilate, the world was spinning out of control, it was getting harder to breathe by the second. An overwhelming sense of dread took over your mind, you were sweating as if it was the hottest day of the year, but it was the exact opposite. “You’re a fucking asshole.. You know.. That?” You said with the calmest voice you can manage at the moment. You were shivering like a leaf, nothing made sense anymore.

 

You took out your gun, observing it with confusion, it made sense to shoot everything and nothing. You started to raise it when a hand stopped yours. “You can get that later.” An unfamiliar voice said, your knees were shaking now, you almost fell to the ground when you caught yourself, er, when he caught you.”You’re a fucking prick!” You yelled out at him, and the sensible thing to do at the time was to kick him off of you.

 

You ran off to god knows where, or so you thought. Instead of running, you instead dropped down to the ground, you sat there for a while, who knows how long. When you felt strong enough you hailed a taxi and went to go to your address, which was no longer a flat. You stared at it in silence, before laughing hysterically, everything felt so unreal, laughing at the situation seemed like the only appropriate reaction to it.

 

“Anyways, how about that offer?” The woman from earlier asked you. “Give me the address.” You chuckled as you looked at her with questioning eyes. “Fine.” She brushed you off. 

 

=======

 

“Why did you do it anyways?” You asked him, most of your anger was now replaced by curiosity and confusion. Most. “Why do people do anything?-” “Don’t you dare” You whispered, “Because i’m bored.” He grinned, which then returned a lot of the anger from earlier. “Don’t quote me pretending to be you, you piece of shit.” You laughed with both entertainment and irritation. “So.. you’re going to have to replace that laptop y’know.” You said with your brows furrowed, which didn’t get any better with his response.

 

“Oh, I actually got you a new one with all of your old data on it-” He was interrupted by you choking him with anger and passion, you yelled out many different obscenities, many of which your mother would not be proud of. You let him get back on is feet before punching his gut, which he fell to the floor in reaction to. You huffed at him before, once again, laughed feverishly.

 

“Okay, but what about my flat?” You finished laughing

 

=======


	9. Awkward Confusion with a Hint of Excitement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess what, short chapter today because I have exams, I hope y'all understand. You live with Jim now.

Your flat. Yes, he burned down your flat and now you have nowhere to live. At least, that’s what you think. Jim gave you a look of.. Worry? It wasn’t really a full on, worried expression, but there was that slightest hint of worry in his eyes. You saw that he was looking for the right words to say, you noticed because it was like you, you often took a while to respond to questions or things that people have said to you, anxious as to what would be the most appropriate word to make you look normal. 

 

“Well, you have two options.” He stated, you guessed beforehand that it was either going to be being homeless or something that you wouldn’t like. “You can either find a home yourself-” Okay, there’s the negative option. “Or..” He continued, it felt like he said the word for much longer than he actually did. You thought about what it could be, go back to living with your mother? Live with your wretched little sister?

 

“You can stay with me for the meantime.” Ah, okay. Wait- what? You snorted in disbelief, this day has become a little too farfetched. Heck, the past 6 days have been. Maybe slow down a little? You stared at him with questioning eyes, “Are you serious?” you asked, and his silence was all that you needed for an answer. “Oh.” You coughed,awkward silence filled the air as your mind went rampant with thoughts.

 

“I might need a day to think about it- wait. I can’t really have a day, I mean…” You thought out loud, as you quickly realized that you had to make this choice within the hour. “I mean, you could give me your address, haha.” Whatever this was, it wasn’t funny. You’re asking the man you hate the most for his address, there is literally nothing to laugh at here.

 

“I mean if you don’t mind-” You said as you cleared your voice. Your shoes were suddenly very interesting at the moment. “Wh-why not? Haha.. ha.” Your nervous laughter was all you could think about, how stupid it sounded was a mystery. “So.. erm, what.. Now?” You asked, more to yourself than to James, but to him, everything is directed at himself. What a perfect match. You gave him an awkward side-glance before taking a deep breath.

 

“So, do you have a driver or something?-” “Of course I have a driver, what do you take me for?” Yes, here comes all the hate from before. You mocked him once again, which resulted in Jim giving you an annoyed look, one of his neutral expressions. “Is he outside or something..?” You once again asked with a brow arched upwards, you really didn’t know how to react to the situation.

 

Jim sighed before briskly walking towards the outside of the building. You struggled to react and ended up hesitating before rushing up to him, “Wait up!”. Needless to say, the car ride was excruciating, it felt like a hundred years before you got to your destination, but Jim’s flat was actually amazing? You mean, you knew what to expect of the man, but this? Holy shit, is he some sort of millionaire?- actually, now that you think about it, he might actually be.

 

“So, what floor are you on?” “I would love to say the top, but the more practical option would be the middle. Of course, it’s the best room.” The statement made you choke on your saliva, this might actually be great.

 

“We have to share rent of course-” “Don’t you like, threaten the company to give it to you free?”


	10. Mischievousness and Evil Looks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A war has commenced.

“Why of course-” “So why the fuck do I have to share the non-existent rent?”

 

You were clearly recovering not only from your attack, but also from your hysterical high from earlier. At times like these, you wonder what you would be like if you were _actually_ high, unfortunately, you were never stupid enough to find out. Your tone rose and lowered on different words, and your confusion was very, very obvious.

 

“Because I said so.” He answered, which you responded to by mocking him. “Are you going to mock me every time I say something you don’t like?” He then asked in retort, which you then replied to with “Of course not, i’ll only do it when you say something asshole-y.”, snorting at the end. You swore you saw a smile in the corner of your eye, but when you looked it wasn’t there. 

 

“By the way I don’t have any clothes, or things, so i’ll just head out for a while, yeah? Oh and..” You were about to ask how many floors it had, but you had counted it already so you just slowly backed off. “Ciao.” He said in farewell. You rushed off to the nearest clothing shop, or well, the nearest clothes shop that you liked.

 

=======

 

After a whole day of buying sweaters, beanies, and the other, more boring kinds of clothing, you managed to pick up some random items along the way. Pens, so many pens, notebooks, journals, books, the like. You couldn’t resist the temptation, they were basically calling out to you. When you got back to Jim’s (expensive) flat, you managed to find his room, at first, the receptionist in front refused to give you access, but you fixed that pretty easily.

 

In the elevator ride, you thought about the receptionist, heck, this wasn’t even technically a flat, it was more like a condo. But back to the receptionist, she was very pretty, the more that you thought about it, a lot of people were pretty. Jim was weirdly attractive, the girl from earlier was pretty, god, why is everyone so good-looking?

 

You finally reached his floor, and to no surprise at all, it was the executive suite. You rapped on the door, hoping that he would answer, which he didn’t. “Open up you asshole.” You yelled to announce your presence, hoping that now he would answer. Luckily, he did, and when he unlocked the door, he immediately left. “Wow, what a gentleman.” You said with sarcasm in your voice. “Busy?” You called out as you went to the vacant room, which you guessed to be yours.

 

“Guess!” He called back at you, you grinned at the thought of him working, it really was an entertaining thought. Your guess was right actually, this was your room, as it had that replacement laptop Jim talked about earlier. You spotted a closet on the side of your room, which you then started to put your clothes in, you were used to moving. You weren’t planning to however, but due to unfortunate events, you had to.

 

Your room had a desk, which you the arranged your pens, notebooks, journals, and books onto it, ready to be used anytime. When you were done, you booted up the new laptop and sure enough, all of your old data was on there. Like, everything. So you guess you had better continue that job from earlier, which was to completely ruin that one guy’s life if you remembered it correctly. You were working on it before Jim called you from outside.

 

“I thought you were busy?” You asked as you took in the sight of James Moriarty cooking. “I was, but i’m hungry so tell me, spicy or sweet?” You were absolutely dumbfounded at this point, you couldn’t process everything that was going on. “What..?-” “Spicy or sweet, Y/N.” You were snapped out of your confused haze and answered with sweet, which Jim only responded to with a “Thanks.” and literally nothing else. Well, except for a grin.

 

You gave him a skeptical look and walked backwards into your room, yes, you were working.But that book seemed to look pretty interesting, but the job was more important.

 

=======

 

James once again called you outside, and you were not greeted by a sight, but a smell. A very good smell in this case. “What do you want this time?” You asked with amusement, the dining table had two plates of food, you assumed one was for you, but you seriously doubted it. “Aren’t you hungry?” He answered, “I already ate, I think.. Did I eat..?” You actually had forgotten if you had already eaten or not. “You haven’t, now eat.” You were confused by his act of kindness, you observed the food, looking for any sign of danger.

 

“Did you poison this?” You asked skeptically, “In a sense.” He responded vaguely. “In a sense- what’s that supposed to mean?” You asked with an even more confused tone, you seriously did not trust this food. You quickly went to your room to get your knapsack, which you kept an array of different detectors for poison. You tested each and every one of them, none of which turned out to be positive.

 

You gave Jim a look before taking a reluctant bite from the plate, and you saw what he had meant by ‘In a sense’, it was _**incredibly**_ spicy. You had responded with an angered tone and immediately looking for milk in the fridge nearby, which there wasn’t any. No water, no milk, no juice, what the fuck?

 

You gave James a furious look before looking once again in your knapsack to get your water bottle, which was luckily there. When you felt good enough to talk, you yelled “You will **pay** for this, you asshole.”, and immediately gulped more water.”You look like a strawberry.” “thanks.” You said, once again sarcastically. An idea had sparked in your mind, you grinned madly at the thought, you looked at him with a prideful stare.

 

“What?” He had asked, now he was the confused one. “James Moriarty, you will pay, and you will pay dearly.” You said with an evil look, he was now even more confused, but you knew well what will occur in the next week. The answer was in your head, and you were much too excited for it.

 

Spice Girls. Wannabe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was the summary too vague? Sorry about that.


	11. Spice and Royalty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim likes wearing things.

You were determined to make the next week focus only on that one song. And you weren’t going to just play it every now and then, you were going to fill every single crevice of his life with it. Your first, albeit weak action was to change his ringtone to the song, which really wasn’t enough for you. No, you were going to constantly call him with different IDs and numbers, at least twice an hour.

 

Your next course of action was to play the song every time he does something he wasn’t supposed to do, or well, when he was doing something when he was supposed to working. He very, very often multi-tasked, you noticed from how he was so familiar with the action. Which only made you even more happy, as it gave you an excuse to overlap and replay the song.

 

The last, but certainly not the least order was to play the song whenever he says something asshole-y, which only made you grin, as you had to pause the conversation, whenever he tried to speak over the music, you would overlap and replay the song. His patience wore thin rather quickly.

 

Every time he would complain about it to you, you would only respond with “It’s your fault~” and played the song afterwards, you were enjoying yourself very much. This week had been a very, very good one. You went for coffee with Jim once, well, technically he just bought you coffee and went to scope out a site, you didn’t ask why, the coffee he bought you was really, really good.

 

=======

 

The end of the week had been a huge relief for Jim, and you had owed him big time. Which had meant you weren’t going to get free food for a week, and no playing music too. Oh and, you have extra work. You were supposed to run one of his phones, yes, one of them; he has more than one.

 

With this newly gained privilege, you had the ability to text Sherlock. You played little games with him, sometimes you just gave him hints on cases he was currently on. He managed to figure out that it was you, and not Moriarty who was running the phone. You still played with him though, it was pretty fun.

 

One time you were really bored, more bored than usual, so you went out to buy something, a gift. Finding the place wasn’t hard, choosing however was the hard part. You of course, picked out the most extravagant of them all, the perfect tiara. When you came back with a frilly looking bag, Jim had obviously been taken aback, you weren’t the type of person to buy things like those.

 

“Who’s that for?” “Why, it’s my gift. A peace-offering.” You answered with a mad grin, you took the tiara out and gave it to him. He was still processing what exactly had happened just now, but when he did, his natural reaction was to put it on of course. “Wait what-” “Look at me Y/N, look at what you made me become.” He said with such nonchalance, that you laughed so hard that you were in goddamn tears, this was too great.

 

In the midst of all the chuckling, you fished your phone out of your pocket and took a picture of the beautiful sight in front of you, this, this was blackmail material. You had calmed after a while, he was still wearing that piece of shit tiara when he walked out of the room, “What, are you going to steal The Crown Jewels?” You chuckled, to which he replied with “Someday.” You didn’t know that he was serious about that.

 

=======

“John! John, come here.” Sherlock had called out, he was on the midst of either an amazing discovery, or a useless one. “What? I was a bit busy-” “I need your opinion on this. Remember Y/N?” “Yes, she kidnapped me for god’s sake.” John replied with both interest and annoyance. “She’s been running one of Moriarty’s phones and playing with me, she texted me something and i’m not quite sure what it means.” Sherlock said with vexation in his tone, he was never really stuck on a lot of things.

 

“I’m not even going to ask, now what does the text say?.. ‘Are you and John having fun? I’m no kryptonian to having an overly asshole-y roommate, we both know him well.’” John looked for what could possibly be wrong with the text. “I don’t see why you need my help.” “The word John, what does it mean?” “You mean kryptonian? Do you actually not know the meaning of the word kryptonian?”

 

John looked at him with disbelieving eyes, there was no way in hell that Sherlock Holmes does not know about Superman. “No, should I?” “Yes! Yes you should. I really do not have time to explain this, it basically means alien, so that should help.” And suddenly, it all clicked. You managing his phone, how you’re obviously at comfort and so used to his presence, and now the text..

 

The only question was why? Why would you, of all people, be living with him? Sherlock pondered about it, you obviously still held feelings, you were completely normal, sure you were pretty clever, but nothing too special. Well, not really.

 

He was about to be proven why in the following day.


	12. Sick and Mad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When sickness comes, you become a bit more... un-hinged. Not that you were batshit-crazy, but a bit more sadistic than usual.

You were not only bored, but also really, really sick. Like, you were actually sick, fever, colds, cough, the whole package. Naturally, you bundled yourself into a mound of blankets, sweaters, and handkerchiefs. Instead of asking for some soup from James, you decided to boot up your new, amazing as fuck laptop and decided to mess with the person who got you into this mess in the first place. The Iceman.

 

He has plenty of surveillance around him, being The British Government has it’s curses. It’s easy to watch him of course, but the messing around part was what you were excited for. The sick either gave you a touch of sadism, or it made you plain mad. You decided to.. Look at his schedule for today, re-arranging things a bit wouldn’t hurt all too much, would it?

 

The people he was supposed to be meeting weren’t all that smart in the first place, or, they were, but they weren’t as skeptical. A simple message was enough to change the meetings, the others needed more persuasion, but you got it done. Holmes was not only very flustered, he was actually in a form, panicking. He was adorable to watch.

 

But that wasn’t the end of it, no, no, no! You wanted to mess around a bit more, scheduling even more events at either exactly at a meeting, or at unreasonable hours. This one meeting, it was special, it had a presentation. Not by Holmes, but it was good enough. You found out what hard drive the guy was using, bought it, made the ‘presentation’, and sent it off with someone you hired, you were so excited for the show, you called in Jim to watch with you.

 

“What is it-” “JUST WATCH MY MASTERPIECE JIM” You half-yelled, your eyes were basically glued to the screen, the view was perfect, and.. It begins. The first part was a video of you, yes, you. “Hello! I’m sick and bored so, here we go.. Holmes? Hermes? Hugh? I forgot, but you! Yes you, Microsoft, I hate you, so have fun watching cat videos for an hour non-stop. You literally can’t escape it, you’re trapped here, until the video finished. I will blow up the fuckingn.. Building if you don’t watch this, so yeah-” The video of you sickly stumbling words out cut to the cat video you were talking about.

 

Were there bombs? Nobody knows, but they obviously didn’t take your threat very seriously, as one guy proceeded to get up, he was about to leave when you told your guard to shoot. His walk was very short-lived, but enjoyable nonetheless. The look of horror on everyone’s faces was good enough to keep you from looking away from the screen. The men in the room began panicking, like a wild herd of sheep that heard a gunshot, scrambling for safety.

 

The danger of the situation sunk into Holmes’s mind, as he finds a way to look for a solution. You were dragged away from the show with a pat from Jim, and his voice saying that “I’ll go and make some soup, stay there.”. You were very much touch-deprived from your 4 month isolation from friends, so you felt unquestionably happy at that moment.

 

You stared at nothing in absolute awe at how amazing it felt to be patted on the head. Is this why animals like being pet? It must be, because you wanted more. When Jim came back you were still staring in surprise at the floor, it was quite a sight. The smell of his delicious cooking made you excited, you grabbed the soup from his hands, gulped at it, and instantly regretted your decision. You had your burned tongue for evidence.

 

“Jesus fuck- that was delicious.. And scorching, I want more.” You grinned, it tasted like heaven, how’d he cook so well? You bet it was store-bought, there’s no way cooking can be that great. “There’s more in the bowl dear, but apparently it was ’scorching’, so you’re going to have to wait.” He said with a straight face, which seemed to make you smile even more.

 

“But i’m hungry and sick! You have to hear me out Jim!” You said in playful protest, which only resulted in a smile from Jim, as he left the room, leaving you with more touch-starved confusion. You wanted to mess with Holmes a bit more, but you’re sure the bombs you set up will be more than enough, the sweet grasps of sleep are taking over your vision, and so you slept. Right there, on the floor, with your head sliding off of the bed ever so slightly.

 

=======

 

When you woke up, you were not only completely on the floor, but it was also approaching midnight. You felt like absolute shit, that is, you felt like shit before you remembered about Holmes, he was supposed to have a meeting soon, you scheduled it for him. You tapped into one of the security cameras to see him… not there. You scrambled to find him, but then you realized: he would be looking for you.

 

The video wasn’t enough to track your location, plain, white backdrop, consistent lighting all throughout, no outside sounds. Only your face. They wouldn’t be able to find out your identity through that, you’ve deleted all your records on every single database, but they could give you a new one.

 

That’s when you got to work, again. You took the risk of showing your face, a bomb threats usually do not go well with the faces of suspects. At first, you were very desperate, which lead to you shutting off the power in the area, which didn’t work since generators exist. This did not go unnoticed, they knew that you were watching now. You needed a distraction, when you thought of the word ‘distraction’, you thought about morse code.

 

It was a common tactic for yourself, keeping someone busy with deciphering the useless message, sometimes they’d even try to find what the code _meant_ , instead of just disregarding it. Just that wouldn’t be enough of course, You hired some desperate men to go on a suicide mission, you felt bad for them, but you had gotten used to it.. Somewhat.

 

You had two options: Raise hell onto the assholes, or delete every single thing that has your name on it. Actually, you could do both.


	13. Escape Plan.. Sort of?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The best escape plan, but also the most thoughtless.

You did your best, you really did. Sure you failed and completely compromised your identity, but you did give them hell. Absolute, fucking, hell. You gave them countless bomb threats, some real, some.. Fake. You gave them billions of different identities, they couldn’t wrap their tiny little heads around it, but they did so anyways. They were lucky to have a Holmes, you were lucky that they had a Holmes.

 

Without Mycroft, life would be so boring, it gave you a challenge. He helped out a lot, actually, he did most of the work. Finding out your identity was not something you had expected to happen; much less get captured. But her you were, staring Holmes with nothing but indifference, waiting for him to ask you something. “Who are you?” You grinned a bit, before responding.

 

“Holmes, you must know who I am! After all, I was the person who planted bombs all over London because I was bored.” Once again, a grin. A mad, mad grin. He obviously wanted a real answer, which you reluctantly gave him. “Okay, fine. My name’s fuck you and go to hell.”, he did not respond very happily with your new answer.

 

He cleared his throat, and said “Who are you?”. This would be the perfect time to laugh hysterically and say something along the lines of ‘I’m your worst nightmare’, but you weren’t actually mad mad. “Isn’t it obvious, Holmes? I am of course the one, the only! I am The Hound, hacker extraordinaire, for hire!” Yes, that’s what you said. With toothy grin this time, you were having fun!

 

Yes, you revealed your identity in a way, but you had a plan, the best escape plan in all of fucking London, and he doesn’t have a clue about it. “So tell me, where are you going to keep me? You know that i’ll escape wherever you send me to, so be frank with me, where?” You said with a grin, everything’s going to plan..

 

“Please, don’t think that i don’t know what you’re doing. We’ve already caught your friend, you’re not going anywhere.” He said with an obvious cocky attitude, how cute; he thought that he won. “Oh but am I, Holmes?” You returned the same cocky tone, you counted in your head, one.. Two… three….

 

BEEP! BEEP! There goes the red flashing alarm, to which you only grinned, “Don’t they need you, Mycroft?” You used his first name this time, you saw his eyes, trying to read you, trying so hard to see what your plan was. He gave you one last look before rushing out the door, which he locked easily.. Not. This particular door had a very discreet lock click, it sounded exactly like the click when the door clicks.

 

Before Mycroft came in to question you, you had fiddled around with the lock from your side, making sure it was too late to tell Holmes, the cameras picked you up doing it, yes, but how you did it, nobody knew. You looked at a cam, gave it a wink, and left. If you hadn’t deleted all of your online data, you would have been dead meat by now.

 

You walked out of the cell, grabbed the nearest guard, and used him as a meat shield from the other guard’s bullets. Adrenaline rushed through your veins, and picking up a gun only made it stronger. You were never really interested in guns, but you did learn the skill. Before you got caught, you memorized the maps you had extracted from their “secure” files.

 

The quickest way out would be up the stairs, to the main lobby sort of area, and then the exit there. But the way to the exit was both agonizing and scary. Which was why you got some distractions. When you got up the stairs, there were men both shooting and dying, perfect. You snuck past the gunfight, and was greeted with a gun to the head.

 

“What did you get yourself into?” You heard a familiar voice say, which filled you with excitement at first, and then dread after. You looked up at the person aiming the gun to then turn around after saying your average “OH! Fuck you.”, and continuing your beeline for the exit. When you heard footsteps behind you, you cocked your gun and aimed.

 

It wasn’t Jim from earlier, it was the damned Holmes. You looked behind him to find Jim, to which you gave a questioning look, and he replied with… a shrug. You looked back and forth at Holmes and James, and Holmes.. And James.. When suddenly you shot his foot and ran the fuck away from there because you aren’t going to deal with that shit.

 

While you wished that it was the end, but sadly that isn’t how life works. You’re going to have to get rid of the bastards on your trail.


	14. It's a gloomy day for the Hacker and the Criminal..

Im sorry guys, I have lost all inspiration for this work. I hope you enjoyed it while it lasted, thank you all for being such a great audience.. As for me, I will start other fics for other fandoms, so sorry if you want more Sherlock stuff, maybe i'll write more when and if Season 5 comes out? Who knows,, well thanks as always,

this is Pixy, signing off.


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